http://www.latimes.com/health/la-he-myturn-breast-cancer-doctor-20111024,0,211643.story
This story details the author, Peggy Stacy,'s relationship with her doctor during her battle with breast cancer.
Language: Stacy describes the plastic drains almost like they have a sinister mind of their own. She personifies them when she says that they "snaked silently" under her shirt. When she uses a simile to compare her meetings with doctors to speed dates, she juxtaposes the situation of her very serious illness with a lighthearted concept like speed dating. She]also personifies the intravenous drugs she takes by describing them as launching an "assault" on her body; this again displays Stacy's negative and suspicious attitude towards the treatments required to save her.
Diction: When Stacy uses macabre to describe the speed dating simile, she is emphasizing the seriousness of her illness and the possible mortal consequences. Her admiration for her doctor is shown when she says that Dr. Chap "radiated" intelligence and a calm demeanor. Previously describing herself as frustrated and in despair, Dr. Chap is her beacon of hope throughout the ordeal. She describes Dr. Chap's steely competence, where the world steely enhances the unyielding nature of Dr. Chap's competence.
Details: When Stacy mentions her hopes to frame her son's college diploma and see her daughter's first prom dress, she reveals the emotional pain that breast cancer has wrought on her. These parenting milestones, taken granted by many, are not guarunteed for Stacy. The juxtaposition of the frightening description of the intravenous drugs and the completely everyday activities of the roomful of women taking them takes the reader by surprise and rids the drugs of the mystique and uncertainty that makes them frightening.
You do a good job of noticing diction and language, but I don't think you have all of them in the right spot. For example, your analyzation of "assault" is very true and pertinent, but because it is only one word, I would place it under "Diction"
ReplyDeleteIt also would be worthwhile to mention that "silently snaked" is a alliteration, just because AP likes hearing that kind of thing.
It would help if you explained yourself a little better, such as when talking about the common parental milestones that Stacy may never know. Yes they aren't guaranteed, but what does that contribute to the work?